Saturday night I had some guy tailgating my back bumper on a dark country road.  When I turned onto the two-lane highway, he stayed on my back bumper and almost got himself T-boned by oncoming traffic that I was able to easily clear but he shouldn’t have even tried.  This is just the latest example of how unsafe some people drive!

As a pizza delivery driver, I see all kinds of examples of unsafe driving and even some very nasty car wrecks.  As a “public safety announcement” I thought I would list a few of them here (and to vent a bit).

Unsafe Driving Practices

• SPEEDING:  along with killing your fuel efficiency and gas mileage (MPG), speeding is not a safe thing to do!  It becomes especially unsafe on the curvy twisting country roads I often deliver on, and is a hazard in town where you might not have the time or distance to stop for a traffic light.
• RUNNING RED LIGHTS:  I understand some yellow lights are very short (I don’t know why) and sometimes people can’t stop in time, but running a red light is dangerous because there are folks who feel a need to to do an extreme “quick start” or “jackrabbit start” off the line as soon as their side turns green, and some jump off that line so fast you have to wonder if they drag race in their spare time!  I’ve seen T-bone wrecks that require the rescue squad, the “jaws of life” and at least two ambulances or even a life-flight helicopter, not to mention the fire trucks, police vehicles, and of course a flatbed wrecker or two to haul what’s left of the car off.  Really, it ain’t worth it … especially if they have to call the coroner instead of an ambulance.
• TAILGATING:  This one really chaps my (donkey) big time.  I drive a stick shift, which means I will likely slow down without using my brakes!  Also, that lighted sign on top of my car says I am WORKING, and if I am going slowly I may be hunting for an address or road … so driving three inches off my back bumper with your high-beams on will NOT make me go any faster.  No, you are not “drafting” either, because before you get close enough to actually draft I will have slammed  on my brakes to get you to back off.  I am older than most tailgaters, and have much better insurance rates … and YOU will get the ticket for failing to maintain a proper following distance.
• FLASHING HIGH-BEAM HEADLIGHTS:  I really don’t understand this one at all.  Why do people feel a need to flash their high-beam lights at me when oncoming?  Do they think they are being cute?  Or are they just that much of a total jack(donkey)?  People in tall trucks seem to do it much more than small car drivers, and it really does temporarily blind me.  It’s even more annoying than those (donkeys) who tailgate with their high-beams on.

Now, for a non-driving but even more important safety tip: MAKE SURE YOUR HOUSE NUMBER IS EASILY VISIBLE FROM THE ROAD!!!  As a pizza driver, this would help me immensely in my job.  You may even think it’s amusing to see me go past your driveway three times hunting for your house with my lighted pizza sign showing how hard a time I am having … but will it be just as amusing when you have a life-threatening situation and it’s the ambulance, fire truck, or police car who can’t find your house?!?  Use reflective house numbers that are two inches tall or larger, and make sure they can be seen from the road even during the late summer when bushes and trees have all of their leaves.  Folks, if the pizza driver who is up and down your road regularly can’t find your house at night, the ambulance driver won’t be able to find it easily either.

Now, for a few tips to make your pizza driver feel safe:

• Turn on your porch light!  It helps us find your house a little easier, and there are some neighborhoods I’ve delivered into that were not safe in the dark.  I carry a large 3 D-cell Mag-Lite flashlight for occasions like that … not just for the light either.  I often tell customers that “porch lights attract pizza drivers.”
• Don’t leave things laying across your sidewalk at night, especially if you don’t bother to turn on that porch light.  I’ve tripped over all manner of things just trying to get to a house’s porch.  If you think I am just whining, pretend I am a paramedic and your child is choking and blue … then maybe it won’t sound as trivial.
• If your dog may be aggressive, put it up.  I have nothing against dogs, or even big dogs (I own a 130 pound Rottweiler).  But I get a little nervous when a customer is at the door yelling at me to stay in my car while they catch and contain their dog.  If you have someone coming to your house, get Cujo in his pen or on a leash … before my tires hit your driveway.

These are just a few safety pointers from my experience as a pizza driver.  I am sure other drivers can chime in with more.

The EPA fuel economy MPG is those numbers they put on the car window sticker that estimate how many miles per gallon (mpg) you should be getting out of your car.  Most people do NOT get that number, but instead get a lower mpg.

I’ve heard folks who maintain their car religiously, check their tire pressure (tyre inflation for the Brits), get an oil change at every 3000 miles on the dot, get their tune-ups on time, and basically do everything under the sun to get the best number of miles per gallon out of their car, then still fail to acheive the number on the window sticker that they laminated and keep in the glovebox.  They ask: Why?

In a nutshell: It’s your driving style!

That’s right, take a good look in the mirror if you’ve done all the maintenance possible and still can’t get up to your EPA fuel economy number.  As a pizza delivery driver, I have probably seen you in MY rear-view mirror or through my windshield, and I can say that all the maintenance in the world will be undone by driving style.  Here are the official EPA tips to improve your mpg through driving style:

• SLOW DOWN!!!  Seriously, most people on the road with me are driving 5-15 mph over the posted speed limit, even through known speed traps and school zones.  The EPA estimates that simply observing the speed limit will save you 7-23%, which translates to $0.23-0.74 per gallon at $3.239 per gallon price (what I saw this weekend).  That doesn’t take into account the expense of getting a speeding ticket and having your driving insurance rate raised.
• Aggressive driving costs you.  Rapid acceleration, especially from a full stop (often called drag racing starts or jackrabbit starts), uses the most gas for the least amount of distance.  I see this the most in town between stoplights!  Why are you in such a hurry to slam on the brakes at the next stoplight?  The EPA estimates that “aggressive driving” costs 5-33% of your mpg depending on just how aggressive you truly drive.  At $3.239 per gallon of gas, that could cost you $0.16-$1.07 per gallon!  So how does it feel to stomp on the gas pedal and know that you just burned 1/3 of your fuel effieciency?  If you can’t tell, this one is a pet peeve of mine, especially when the aggressive driver is directly behind me.
• Excess weight in your car makes your engine work harder.  The EPA estimate is 1-2% per every 100 pounds of extra weight in your car, which translates to $0.03-$0.06 per gallon of gasoline.  Basically, if you are dragging around excess weight you just negated any savings you might have gotten by price shopping or using a discount card at the pump.
• Avoid idling.  When you are idling, you are burning gas to go absolutely nowhere.  I always turn the Pizza Taxi off instead of idling at a customer’s house or at the shop in between deliveries. (No EPA figures)
• Use cruise control (if you have it).   This helps you keep a smooth constant speed on the highway as opposed to the speed-up-slow-down routine, even on the hills.  Hubby’s truck has cruise control, but as a 5-speed the Pizza Taxi doesn’t. (No EPA figures)
• Use overdrive if you have it.  Once you are up to highway speed, pop it in overdrive to let your engine work less. (No EPA figures)

I know some of y’all are wondering just how well I do against the EPA figures for my Pizza Taxi.  Here are the stats I plugged into the “Find your fuel economy” page: 2000 Ford Escort ZX2 5-speed manual.

• Old EPA fuel economy: 25 mpg city and 33 mpg highway
• New EPA fuel economy: 22 mpg city and 30 mpg highway
• MY fuel economy on the last fill-up (Thursday before work to Saturday after work)  325 miles travelled, 9.6 gallons of gasoline used for 34.58 mpg!
• My record for city and delivery mpg: last summer I got 35.8 mpg while driving for Domino’s and delivering into downtown even!
• My record for highway mileage: 39.2 mpg on a road trip about three years ago immediately after an oil change and tune-up and driving on a windless mild day.

I beat the old EPA fuel economy numbers, and stomp all over the revised numbers.  Why?  HOW?  I follow all the tips I just listed for y’all, plus a few of my personal gasoline-saving driving tips listed last week.

Here’s my challenge for everyone: Try one week of driving like the EPA and I recommend, and figure your gas mileage.  To do this, start with a completely full gas tank and either note your starting miles on the odometer or reset your trip meter to zero.  When you go to fill up again, top it off, and the number of gallons it takes is how much you used.  Then divide number of miles traveled by gallons used for your mpg.  Compare this number to what the EPA says you should be getting (both old and new numbers for fun!) and post it here

With the price of a gallon of gasoline climbing higher than most of us Americans find comfortable, any and all driving tips to save on fuel consumption helps.  I deliver pizzas on the weekends, so I not only know how important saving money at the gas pump can be, I also know what to do to accomplish this!

Most of these tips are simply common sense, and can be found all over the internet.  This is the list of things *I* do to get over 30 miles per gallon in my 2000 Ford Escort ZX2 5-speed while delivering pizzas:

1. If you have a manual transmission, use that to your advantage!  I drive up and down hills all the time, and am in the habit of pushing in the clutch and coasting downhill.  I also push in the clutch when I see the traffic light has turned red.  Why use gas when you can let gravity work?  Even if you drive an automatic transmission, you can ease up on the accelerator (gas pedal) on the downhill.  (Note: It is my understanding of the law here in Tennessee that this is legal as long as you keep the transmission in gear, not in nuetral!)
2. Driving on the street is not a drag race!  There are very few times you should need to gas your car off the line after the light turns green.  Smooth and moderate accelerations instead of the quick stomp the pedal routine will add up.
3. Speaking of speed, there is really no need to exceed posted speed limits.  In addition to the risk of getting a speeding ticket, driving the speed limit or just under it will save on fuel consumption.  Why speed anyway when you will end up stopping at a red light quicker in town?
4. Routine maintenance WILL save you on gas!  Can I say this enough times?  Get your oil changed regularly (especially if you drive a Ford LOL they are picky about that), have your tire inflation checked regularly, and have your air and fuel filters changed on a regular basis.  Tune-ups can do wonders for your vehicle’s gas mileage when done on schedule.
5. On a similar note, don’t let repairs go!  If you know something is wrong with your motor, drivetrain, or suspension get those fixed.  I personally don’t consider air conditioning to be a necessity, but different people have different tolerances there.  If you are not mechanically inclined, have your mechanic check your belts and hoses and other moving parts.
6. Don’t carry around heavy stuff in your car unless necessary.  The more weight your engine needs to haul around, the more work it needs to do and the more gas it will need to use.  I try to limit the Pizza Taxi to only toting around three textbooks per semester.
7. Plan your route not for the shortest distance per se, but the one with the least amount of stoplights and idling for an opening in traffic.  One thing I learned quickly when I started delivering pizza is that sometimes the “longcut” is much quicker and easier than a “shortcut” that may save you on the odometer.

Those are just the ordinary basic things that everyone could do to save a little bit of money at the gas pump.  If you feel bold you might want to google the term “hypermiler” but I can’t recommend all the techniques you’ll find in those links.  Some more tips that might help you (and again are common sense):

• Combine errands and trips to reduce the number of times you need to drive.
• Carpool with a coworker.  Even if you only do this once a week, that is 20% less driving, and you’ll have someone to chat with for the commute.
• On the flip side, offer to give your coworkers rides for a little bit of gas money.  If everyone riding with you chips in, that cuts the amount out of your pocket.
• Walk or bicycle if your destination is close enough.  This one might even help with a fitness goal!
• Use public transportation if available.

These are all things I have used or do use.  I see no reason to pay more for gas for my little car than is absolutely necessary.  Now it’s y’all’s turn:  What are your tips for getting the best gas mileage out of your vehicle (and saving money at the gas pump)?

Photo uncredited, received via email from my dad.

I got called in to work last night, and had just a horrible night.  Seriously, my worst since leaving Domino’s back in the fall. So:

**** RANT ALERT **** RANT ALERT ****** RANT ALERT *****

I couldn’t believe how many folks either tipped a pittance or didn’t tip at all last night.  One of the reasons I switched stores and employers was because my current store, an independent, has a much better clientele.  No more “ghetto runs” as we called them at Domino’s, where you had to wonder about your safety as your walked up to the customer’s house at night.

And there is also the tipping.  Usually, I make mad money on tips at my current store.  Not last night.  I had two out of 11 runs not tip at all.  On Monday night I had every run tip, but two of them only tipped less than a dollar.

Folks, gas is now officially over $3 per gallon in this town!!  No, the store does NOT buy our gas.  No, the store does NOT provide our vehicles, or any maintenance on them.  I didn’t even make enough last night on ELEVEN freakin orders to fill up my gas tank, and remember the Pizza Taxi is a little Ford Escort that only takes about 11.5 gallons to fill from bone-dry to completely full.  (Good thing it only uses a quarter of a tank on normal nights!)

Y’all probably do not want to know what we drivers say about non-tipping customers.  We definitely have our opinions, and they are not nice.  Read on at your own risk.

To me, if a person does not tip at all, that says two things about them: one, they are a cheap(*skate) and that is censored.  Two, they just have no class.  None.  Think about it: They don’t want to expend their own gas and time and effort to go get their pizza, but they refuse to compensate me for doing it for them.  And for some strange reason, the notorious non-tippers at our store ALL live five or more miles out from the store!  No.  Class.  Cheap(*donkeys).

And every single one of us drivers KNOW those addresses that don’t tip at all.  If we get multiple orders in a run … guess which one gets delivered last?  And gets put on the bottom?  Petty?  Yeah, it’s probably petty.  The boss man won’t cut them off on delivery (well, I take that back, he did cut one off, and I asked him to cut another off last night) so we still have to take them their $30-80 orders for absolutely no reward.  Yes, the non-tippers usually order a lot of food.  At Domino’s, even with many more notorious non-tippers, we still all knew the addresses.

“But don’t you get the delivery charge?”  Um, nope.  When I got my very first job in 1989 working inside a pizza place, we paid drivers $1.25 per run and had free delivery.  Guess what I make today?  $1.25 per run.  At Domino’s they adjusted it to what gas prices did, so we could make as little as $1 per run last summer.  So NINETEEN years later I am making the same money per run as a “gas offset” even though gas prices are almost three times higher.

And to top off my bad night last night, the last order wasn’t even home when I brought the pizza!  This is the absolute pinnacle of rudeness.  The lady was home, but she had no money, so she called up her man on the cell phone, and he asked me to sit in his driveway and wait for him to come home.  Then he stopped by the store and paid for the pizzas, so the boss man called me to tell me to give the lady the food.  Of course … you guessed it … no tip.  So I asked the boss man to cut that address off for delivery.  That guy can pick up his own pizza since he obviously doesn’t value the effort of this delivery driver.  Our time is money when we’re working.  Rude.  No class.  Cheap (*donkey).

Folks, when a pizza driver is sitting idle, that pizza driver is making only minimum wage (in Tennessee it is the FEDERAL minimum wage of $5.85 per hour).  In my store, everyone except the owner is a student.  A few are still high school students working their first job, but the rest of us are in college.  Even us two “old gals” as the kids call us.  When I worked at Domino’s the story was pretty much the same: mostly college students, trying to get money for books and tuition to avoid student loans.

If you’ve read this far down, you’ve either delivered pizzas yourself or have a strong heart.  I found a website the other night run by pizza drivers called Tip The Pizza Guy (ok, they are gender-biased) that will give you even more insight into how we think and what we do. 

It also quoted a rather disturbing statistic: pizza delivery drivers are the #3 workers who DIE on the job.  About 6-8 weeks ago, a driver was shot and killed right here in town (but a totally different neighborhood from where I deliver!).  Most of us drivers are college students, and those that aren’t have pizza delivery as a second job (especially those of us who listen to Dave Ramsey).

So seriously: TIP YOUR PIZZA DELIVERY PERSON!!!